Think fast:  What was the highlight of E3 2007?

Time's up.

The correct answer is that the entire event sucked dirty balls.  I've been looking for something (anything!) E3-related to write about, but I keep drawing a blank.  Every announcement was either something we all saw coming ten miles away (PSP redesign, yet another 360 SKU), or something so fucking asinine that words fail me (PSP redesign, Scene It?).

Here's a quick re-hash for those who just absolutely need it:

Nintendo

You still can't buy a Wii unless you're willing to turn tricks behind your local Circle K.  The DS is still a phenomenon.  And I think Reggie said there was a slim possibility that they might be making some sequels and spin-off games for a few of their popular franchises.  Sounds like a lovely change of direction.

Microsoft

Yep, there's another version of Xbox 360 to consider.  Halo 3 is in development.  The rumors were true, it seems.  They're looking to strengthen online gaming or something.  I didn't catch it all.  At this point I was looking for free Scandinavian foot fetish clips in another window.

Sony

In an effort to breathe new life into the PSP and gobble up some handheld market share, Sony unveils a redesign that… looks exactly like the original.  Brilliant.  There was also something about Metal Gear Solid 4, which knocked me right the hell out of my chair.  Don't read this if you hate spoilers:  Snake is a lot older this time.  

Big Finish

And now, I humbly submit to you my personal favorite moment from E3 2007:  Tecmo's refusal to so much as appear.  Apparently, their VP had some unambiguous words about the new format and the people running the joint.  That made me smile more than any game I saw covered.  (Okay, with the exception of Super Mario Galaxy.  The immature bastard child in me really, really wants to be Bumblebee Mario…)

That's my take on E3 2007.  Drink it up.

PS - I know this is juvenile, but did anyone else giggle when they read "Wii Zapper?"  It made me think of an old girlfriend… and why I'm no longer allowed within 500 feet of her.

Microsoft

What can be said about Microsoft’s briefing? Easily the most boring of the three because Microsoft chose to focus primarily on games that will be available this year and only briefly mentioning big 2008 titles like Too Human, Alan Wake, Fable 2, and Banjo Kazooie 3. The entire thing just felt like a giant rehash of things everyone already knows. Don’t get me wrong, MS is in an enviable position being the only system on which you can play both Halo 3 and GTAIV and they made sure no one forgot it. That’s going to be a hard combo for Sony to counter, especially when the 360 is cheaper, to boot.

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Unlike the rest of the crew, I could pretty much sum up my thoughts in a few words or less: underwhelming. Just about every conference left me wanting more. More games. More surprises. More to actually be genuinely enthusiastic about. While there's a few out there who actually miss the E3 of old, the rest of the industry has more or less embraced the leaner, quieter atmosphere which now resides within select posh hotels and the new epicenter for featured demos: Barker Hanger.

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2007 is shaping up to be a solid year for the PSP. I am serious… Not only has Sony reaffirmed its support for the handheld with the sleeker, lighter design, but the first/third-party support in my opinion is stronger than its ever been. With the holiday season just a few months away, Sony is gearing up with several limited edition PSP packages. I briefly touched upon the first collector's package: the Cermaic White model (launching this October for $199) will be bundled with the exclusive Star Wars Battlefront: Renegade Squadron and sport a Darth Vader silk-screen directly on the unit. 

Sony will also be rolling out a limited edition package for Daxter, featuring the all-new "Ice Silver" PSP model as well as a Family Guy themed-bundle which contains a UMD version of Family Guy - The Freakin' Sweet Collection and a 1GB Memory Stick Pro DUO. In addition to the new Entertainment Packs, the Core Packs will continue to be made available for $169.99. 

With over 140 titles planned for release this fiscal year, I can't think of a better reason to own a PSP. Now if only they could work on expanding the amount of games which can be played beyond your local area. Titles like Wipeout Pulse demand it.

Forget everything you used to remember about Sony's past E3 press conferences. This year's presentation put aside the sleep-inducing sales figures in favor of what's it's all about: the games. The PlayStation portfolio was surprisingly strong — enough to shut the mouths of naysayers who've been expecting the PS3 in particular to go belly up. And while the company kicks things up another notch for its next-gen system, they've made sure not to overlook their handheld market. 

Yes, there's another PSP on the way, touting a more streamlined design along with some remarkable additions that's sure to pique the interest of any fence-sitters and early adopters of the first-generation model. The new video-out port is by far, one of the biggest highlights of the "PSP Lite", allowing players to finally enjoy their gaming and multimedia experiences on their TV. The new PSP will also provide reduced load times during gameplay, thanks to a new enhanced featured which temporarily stores game data from the UMD. Taking a page from their Japanese counterparts, North American consumers can look forward to three basic color options (Piano Black, Ceramic White, and Ice Silver). If I recall correctly, the last color will actually be sold as a bundle package for the newest addition to the Star Wars Battlefront: Renegade Squadron franchise (Chewie even made a guest appearance this year and gave his personal blessing, heh). Look for its debut in North America, Europe and Japan this September.