After playing the God of War II demo, I think I may have a man-crush on Kratos. The dude’s a bad ass. Sure, he’s in dire need of some anger management classes, but the “Ghost of Sparta” is a total chick magnet. His pimp hand is so strong he got Athena to help make him a god. She even hooked him up with some wicked cool armor and new blades to keep his bitches in check. Now that’s a sugar momma.

It seems good cooking isn’t a characteristic common to Greek women. They just can’t keep Kratos happy, and in his rage he wages war on city after city, pissing off the other gods in the process. It’s unclear why the gods of Olympus would be surprised at his behavior. Causing havoc is clearly on the job application for god of war. Apparently Kratos does his job a little too well.

When Kratos starts tearing apart yet another city and turns his back on Athena, she cock-blocks hardcore and starts taking away his powers. She also takes it upon herself to animate a colossal statue to set loose on Kratos. Pissing Kratos off is not a good idea. He immediately brings the pain to anyone unfortunate enough to stand within his reach.

It’s good to see SCEA didn’t fix what isn’t broken. The murderous symphony of death is still undeniably entertaining. This time around we’ll actually get to kill something with Athena’s blades (which shimmer a lustful gold). The arsenal of combos is tweaked a bit with the addition of some variables. L1 acts as the block button and switches up the action buttons to perform another set of death ensuing moves. They’ll come in handy during the over the top boss fights. Battles seem to go on forever, but it adds a lot of scale and makes the fight seem much more epic.

If a demo can make me ramble on like a little teenage girl, then the real game will be nothing short of amazing. The 13th is way too long to wait to start handing mythological creatures their asses. Considering they have one at all.